Introduce yourself

When I turned 30 I felt the need to figure THIS out. Why are we here? What are we supposed to be doing? How do we do that? I had been raised a Christian by a mom that forced me to go to Sunday school but would not go to church herself. My version of Christianity was formed by Jim Baker, Jimmy Swaggart, Pat Robertson and the like.

So yeah, Christianity wasn't working for me. At all. I began reading books about other religions, Spirituality and quantum physics. This was the dawning of the internet and I joined various discussion forums where new and different perspectives were shared. I began meditating and found that it came naturally, easily. I had been a quiet, content baby and toddler, so it follows that I was "ripe fruit".

My wife at the time was also brought up in a dysfunctional Christian home and this change of course I was taking came to a head and we became divorced. I started calling myself a "Buddhist", mainly because there were no Hindus around and Buddhism included meditation, which I intuitively felt to be paramount.

But after a decade of "being a Buddhist", I was still seeking. While it was a better fit, there was something still not quite complete. Then I came across the teaching of Ramana Maharshi.

All seeking stopped and all of my focus went into the practice of, as Ramana put it: "(being) rid of current thoughts; that is all." This new hard-core perspective didn't fit well with, well anyone. My brother and sister stopped talking to me. I remember being at my brother's place at Easter and at one point he was literally yelling at me that I was "going to hell." The zen priest that I was sitting with presented me with an official letter from the sangha informing me that I had been kicked out and if I wanted to return I would have to attend a meeting and agree to conditions. I thanked her and informed her that I was no longer "a Buddhist." At this point a Buddhist friend of over a decade also shunned me and my number system theory (she has a PhD in evolutionary biology. Her son got his PhD in mathematics. Imagine how well my theories were accepted! Acedemia, eh?).

I deepened my practice and let the universe do as it would.

Now I have a perfect romantic relationship with a like-minded girl, and am retired on a 30 hectare plot of gorgeous lakefront property, in a house the locals call "The Castle". Shop, greenhouse, chicken coop, all here needing some TLC. We even have our own private landing strip! We are working toward complete self-sufficiency and I spend most of my time holding stillness within the collective consciousness and getting this message out.

Just hold to the practice. Everything flows naturally, effortlessly from (t)here.

Hi future readers,

This is Solution Seeker. After serious and sustained solution seeking, I have found myself here. I started off indoctrinated into catholicism as a child, became an atheist in college after questioning my beliefs, and only recently identified some flaws in my thinking at the start of 2022. The primary flaw was a fundamental misunderstanding of "the hard problem of consciousness". The solution to which was a figure-ground reversal from materialism to idealism, and then to the triune system (information, cognition, and the relation between the two which is awareness (or telesis in CTMU terms)), where awareness generates the thought and physical realms. I now consider myself to be a nonconceptualist.

It now seems apparent to me that the cycles of birth and death are designed for God to know what it is by figuring out what it's not through the dissociation of fragments of its awareness. God is not JUST the dissociated fragments, but rather the entirety of existence (including all fragments). To transcend the thought and physical realms by abiding in awareness is to self-unify. We are all one, and that one is God.